Finally happy with that document you’ve been working on all morning?
Great. Now go back and cut 20%.
That’s right. Shear it of a fifth before you press “send”. I guarantee the end result will be better than what you have now.
Not sure where to start? Here are some hints on what to discard. Read the rest of this entry »
As regular readers will know, I’m a strong advocate of business English that’s short and to the point. But there are times when business writing demands more words, rather than fewer. When, for the sake of good business relationships, it pays to be wordy and indirect. Read the rest of this entry »
1. They got you used to a captive audience
At school, you handed in your homework and it came back marked. This process taught you that every word you wrote would be read and evaluated by someone deeply interested in your thoughts.
Things couldn’t be more different in business. Your colleagues and clients are busy people with a hundred different demands on their time. And unlike your teachers they aren’t paid to read your stuff.
The lesson: In business, unlike at school, you have to fight to be read. Accept that most people will scan your words. Make it easy on them by using headers, bullets and short paragraphs.
2. They taught you to write with a beginning, a middle and an end
At school you learned that any essay must have an introduction and a conclusion. The meat of your argument came in the middle.
Judging by the number of business documents we’ve seen that begin by setting the scene, explaining the context and generally “warming the reader up”, this is a hard habit to shake.
But in business, you don’t have the luxury of the preamble. Your readers are time-pressed, so you need to dive straight in with your main point.
The lesson: Before writing that email, memo, web page or report ask yourself “what do I want my reader to do as a result of my words?”. The answer gives you your first line.
3. They taught you to pad, not prune
At school, you were told to expand on your answers. And while this trained you to think more deeply about questions, it also taught you to value padding over pruning – as editor Bill Harper has also argued.
Alas in business, sometimes people really do just want a “yes” or “no” answer. Filling pages for the sake of it is more likely to exasperate than impress your reader.
The lesson: Prune, prune and prune again! Once you’ve reached the point where you’re happy with your work, go back and cut 20%.
4. They rewarded you for using fancy words
When you were introduced to a new word at school, your teachers no doubt asked you to use it in a sentence to prove you understood it properly.
This task was essential because it increased your vocabulary. But it also subtly rewarded you for using words that were new and strange and only just within your grasp.
Pretentious words, nasty neologisms and impenetrable corporate jargon are your adult equivalent.
But such words are letting you down. In business, your goal is to be clear and persuasive, not to impress some authority figure.
The lesson: If there’s a choice between a short word and a long word, go for the short one. For example, say “start”, not “commence”, “after”, not “subsequently” and “change”, not “adjustment”.
And never use a word you wouldn’t use outside the office – do you “align”, “integrate” or “leverage” things at home?
5. They made you distance yourself from your words
At school, we were taught that overt references to the reader (as “you”) or the writer (“I”) were a no-no. In academic or scientific writing this approach made you sound more persuasive because you appeared objective.
For example, in the chemistry lab you were taught to use a passive form, such as “the sodium chloride was added to the test tube” rather than the active form “I added the sodium chloride to the test tube”.
Or in a literature essay, you’d win points for a formal expression like: “Hamlet’s fatal flaw might be considered to be procrastination”. You’d probably lose marks for the more familiar: “You could say Hamlet’s fatal flaw was procrastination”.
Alas, the reverse is true in business writing. In business, address your reader as “you” and she feels a connection with you. Refer to yourself as “I”, and you sound accountable.
Compare: “It is regrettable that mistakes were made in the dispatch of the order” with “I’m sorry your order didn’t arrive on time”. Which would you rather hear?
The lesson: Learn to spot passive verb forms and rework them so they’re active. Address your reader as “you”. This article, for example, contains over 70 references to “you” or “your” – that’s nearly 10% of the whole text. Does it sound any less authoritative for its friendly approach?
6. They taught you outdated rules about grammar
You can’t blame your teachers for instilling in you the rules that apply to academic prose. And if you went on to university, such rules probably fared you well.
But as any writer will tell you, in business writing it’s perfectly OK to start a sentence with “and” or “but”. In fact, doing so can make your sentences shorter – and your writing easier to read.
Similarly, contractions aren’t a problem if you’re after a conversational style.
And if a split infinitive just sounds better to the ear, feel free to boldly go there.
The lesson: Break the rules if the result sounds better and is easier to read. Develop a writer’s ear by reading your work aloud.
Follow us on Twitter for regular business writing tips.
1. Take a tip from Elmore Leonard: leave out the parts that people skip.
2. Use “people”, not “persons” (unless you really do want to sound like you’re arresting said “persons”).
3. Avoid tracked changes. They make work hard to proof and they’re terrible for working relationships.
4. Accept that your readers will scan. Make it easy for them with headers and paragraph returns.
5. It’s either “just as” or “equally” – never the horrible hybrid “equally as”.
6. The word “currently” is often redundant, as here: “We are currently updating our website”.
7. There’s no need for the jargon “best of breed” – “best” is enough.
8. “Imply” and “infer” mean different things: if you imply something, I might infer it.
9. “Momentarily” means “for a moment”, not “in a moment”.
10. When researching a piece, pick up the phone. You’re guaranteed to get better results than by emailing.
11. Drop the overused adjective “key” – it invariably attracts other jargon (“stakeholders”, “learnings”).
12. If you must use PowerPoint, stick to 4 or 5 bullets a slide (and 4 or 5 words to a bullet).
13. Save “takeaway” for that kebab you had on the way home last night. “Point” or “lesson” are better.
14. Remember to use an apostrophe in phrases like “one week’s notice” and “ten years’ experience”.
15. Taking minutes? Record important points, decisions and “to dos”, not “he said then she said” etc.
16. Numerals: spell out “one” to “ten”. Use figures for “11” or more.
17. Write your headline first – it will help crystallise your main point.
18. Need feedback on your writing? The more senior they are, the less they’ll rewrite for the sake of it.
19. “Now” is more powerful than wordy alternatives like “at this moment in time”.
20. Don’t call attention to the act of writing. “I hereby inform you of our new address” = “We’re moving”.
21. Far better to start a sentence with “and” than to ever use the word “additionally”.
22. Never choose a long word when a short one will do.
23. For good working relationships, get or give feedback on writing by phone or in person, not email.
24. Proofreading? Check headers, footers, captions etc both separately and as part of the whole.
25. Watch your tone: never say something in an email in a way you wouldn’t say it to their face.
See also:
More super-quick tips for better business writing
Another 25 super-speedy tips for better business writing
25 super-quick tips for better business writing
Today, we have the debut post from the other half of Doris and Bertie, David Pollack.
I don’t know about you but, whenever I pass a construction site, I always ask myself if they’re doing all they can not to kill me. Often, just to be sure, I cross the street. Well, imagine how happy I was to see this.
Have you noticed how so much business English is written in a bizarrely evasive style? As if it’s been picked over and emasculated by Legal and a host of other paranoid “key stakeholders” (as they no doubt like to be called) before publication?
Nowhere is this timorous tone of voice more obvious than in those lists of corporate values that companies feel they have to compile (presumably because everyone else does). Read the rest of this entry »
Increasingly, people on my business writing courses are asking me for advice on how to communicate bad news, particularly job cuts. Read the rest of this entry »
How do you balance communicating management views while trying to keep employees interested in your staff newsletter? Read the rest of this entry »
Write for your mum: that’s a piece of advice we at Doris and Bertie often give our clients. So in our third post on readability, we thought we’d actually put some business writing to the “mum” test. Read the rest of this entry »
See our earlier tips: 1- 25 and 26-50.
Follow us on Twitter for regular business writing tips.
51. Yes, it is OK to start sentences with ‘and’, ‘because’, ‘or’ and ‘but’.
52. Don’t say “following” when you mean “after”.
53. Try copying the style of your daily paper. It’s guaranteed to be more readable than most business docs.
54. Edit with a knife, not a pen. Only add words if they’re absolutely necessary.
55. Write about the stories that illustrate what you want to say, not the strategy behind it.
56. Pin a list of banned words on your wall. It forces you to rethink whenever you’re tempted by jargon.
57. Never write a sentence longer than 24 words. That’s the point they get hard to follow.
58. Use “you” more than “we”. Count the instances of each word and rewrite if necessary.
59. Overpoliteness can sound rude. Compare “at your earliest convenience” with “as soon as you can”.
60. Address your reader directly: “download the guidelines now” not “employees should download…”
61. Say “based on”, not “based around”. Think about it: bases sit below things, not around them.
62. No one will ever complain that your writing is too easy to read.
63. Rewriting your work isn’t a sign of failure – it’s an essential part of the process.
64. There’s a reason your spellchecker underlines “learnings”. Replace this non-word with “lessons”.
65. Is there any more meaningless adjective than “meaningful”? Avoid. Avoid. Avoid.
66. Whenever you sit down to write, keep in mind Billy Wilder’s 1st rule of filmmaking: “Don’t be boring”.
67. The word “solutions” is usually redundant. “Building solutions” v “building”: what’s the difference?
68. Save keystrokes by ditching “nevertheless” for “but”.
69. As Orwell said, if it’s possible to cut a word, do. A phrase like “by means of” is 2 words too long.
70. Never use “myself” when you mean “I” or “me”. It’s not more polite – just grammatically wrong.
71. Ditch “there is/there are”. “We won for two reasons” is punchier than “there are two reasons we won”.
72. Tempted to use the phrase “due to the fact that”? Why not simply say “as”?
73. Made a mistake? “I’m sorry” is much more powerful than “we regret that”. Which would you rather hear?
74. Avoid Latinisms like “per annum” and “per capita”. Friendlier to say “a year” and “a person”.
75. As your teachers said at exam time: just answer the question. What info is your reader asking for?
